To Blake On Your Fourth Birthday

Dear Blake, my cheeky monkey! 

I remember holding you for the very first time and i just couldn't take my eyes off you. At 6lb 9oz you were so tiny and the new born clothes were far too big for you on your little body. I remember the mixture of feelings from full on instant love to being terrified about being a mum and hoping I would be good enough.

All of a sudden you are now four and like each year on your birthday I feel that sense of sadness of how quickly you are growing up.  Four seems so grown up and the baby years far behind us. I was really hoping that the time wouldn't come around so fast but it has.

Four seems like a milestone as you will be starting school in September and to me it doesn't seem possible as you are still so little to me. I'm definitely not ready for it at all! Especially with knowing the struggles you face and going through trying to get a diganosis for Autisim so that you get the important help you need.

I'm not going to dwell on it as today has been an exciting day for you. We decided against a party for you this year as we thought Butlins would be a great alternative instead and I'm so glad you loved our little holiday. It's been so lovely seeing you so happy and excited being totally in your element and saying wow constantly. Now we are home we decided to make your actual birthday a quiet one with both your Granny and Nanny popping over with presents and enjoying chocolate cake along with having lots of fun with your birthday gifts. You have well and truly been spoilt! 

You love being outdoors and if you could would spend all day at the park. You've recently found a love for arts and crafts especially at preschool and you are really good at recognising your numbers and colours. I'm so proud of how your speech is coming along even though you are still classed as behind.  

I really hope that you've had such a wonderful birthday Blake and I can't wait to see how much you change and grow in your fourth year. You make me proud every single day and I'm so looking forward to the adventures we get up to.

Love you lots my little pickle 


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